Wednesday, September 24, 2008

THAT was awkward

I've had a couple of awkward moments recently that are worth sharing:

1. A young man (late 20's??) was in front of me in line at the grocery store. He pulled out his wallet to pay and I noticed something fall out of his wallet. He didn't notice, so on my way down to pick it up for him I say, "Oops! You dropped something! Here." As I handed him the dropped item, I noticed it was a condom and I said, "Oh... umm... here. Awkward." What made it more awkward is that he darted out and didn't say anything. Not even "thanks!"

2. One day a while ago I was crying at home; I had to leave so I went to grab tissue to take to the car with me only to find out I was out of tissue. What's the next best thing? Toilet paper. So I take a roll of toilet paper to the car with me and when I was done crying, I stashed it in my glove box. Then a few weeks ago I had a friend in the car with me who was having "tummy issues." She had to make a pit-stop at the drugstore for some Imodium while we were in my car. She took her pill, "tummy issue" was solved and shoved the box in my glove box... and forgot it when she left. Ya... you see where this is going. So the other day I had someone in my car (who I don't know that well). He was helping me fix something in my car and I told him to check the Owner's Manual that was where? In my glove box. I'm sitting in the driver's seat. He opens my glove box and in slow motion I see the box of Imodium fall into his hands, followed by my 1/4 roll of toilet paper. He looks at me, Imodium and toilet paper in hands, confused (rightfully so!) I quickly respond, "oh, the Imodium is not mine and the toilet paper is here because I was crying and I had no tissue... I promise." He just chuckled... I mean, could I sound any more defensive? He lays the items in his lap and then reaches for the Owner's Manual. As he pulls it out, my entire stash of feminine products fall out with it. I look at it all laying at his feet and just say, "Oh. Here. I'll get those." He just sat there as I picked each one off the floor. "Well... this is awkward," I said as I closed the glove box.

See - told you it was worth it!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Be a Fly on My Wall

I've told you before about how the Communication Manager, Lisa*, at my office always says things wrong. Let me tell you a conversation that occurred yesterday:

Lisa walks in on a meeting my boss and I were having and said, "I feel so frazzered today."
(Translation: "I feel so frazzled today.")
When she was corrected, she said, "Oh. Huh... I've always thought it was frazzered. Oh well."
We chuckle.
Then she says, "I don't know what the deal is; I just can't seem to get my work on."
(Translation: "I can't seem to focus.")
Boss laughs and says: "That's not something I want to hear."
Lisa: "Oh, don't act like you've never been flazzered." She looks at me. "Did i say it right?"
We laugh and correct her as she walks off.
As she's walking off she says, "What does that really mean anyway?"


*to protect her privacy, the name has been changed. ;)