So You Think You Can... Shut up!

I enjoy watching So You Think You Can Dance. And while I feel like I need to rationalize that to prove that I'm still cool, I'll refrain. Mary Murphy (in the pic) is a judge on this show and every time she comes on, I have to mute it. Her voice is the most absolutely annoying thing to listen to. As if the shrieking tone isn't enough, she has to yell things like "YOU HAVE JUST BOUGHT YOURSELVES TWO FIRST-CLASS TICKETS ON THE HOT TAMALE TRAIN! WAAAAOOOOOOOO!" All in one breath. And don't get me started on the laugh.

This video though makes me laugh... Mary makes The Soup often (another great show).

What Was That?

Here is my list of Top Ten worst lyrics... ever. As you read them, remember someone wrote them and said "perfect!" Someone else listened to it and said "yes." And quite possibly a third person heard it and said "I want to record that." And then YOU bought it and sang along. What I'm saying is that multiple people thought it was good before you heard it and cringed. (side note: I'm not saying I hate the song, I just don't like this particular lyric. Some songs I do hate though. ahem... Fergie... ahem)

10. Wake me up before you go go/ Don't leave me hangin on like a yo-yo." Wake Me Up, WHAM!

9. God must have spent a little more time on you. N'Sync (or Backstreet Boys... one of 'em)

8. Fergilicious definition make them boys go loco. Fergilicious, Fergie

7. You're on my heart just like a tattoo/ I'll always have you. Tattoo, Jordin Sparks

6. Whatcha gonna do with all that breast/All that breast inside your shirt. My Humps, BlackEyed Peas

5. Between the red cells and white/ Somethin's not right Sara Beth, Rascall Flatts

4. I don't like cities, but I like New York/ Other places make me feel like a dork. I Love New York, Madonna

3. Let me see that tho-o-ong/ Thong th thong, thong thong. The Thong Song, Cisco (now admit it, you totally sang along)

2. 'Cause my swag is serious/ Somethin heavy like a first-day period. Feedback, Janet Jackson

and the #1 WORST lyric ever. I almost go into a full rage if I hear it:

1. And I miss you like a child misses its blanket. Big Girls Don't Cry, Fergie

What are your least favorite lyrics??

Hey Smart One

In case you didn't know what to do at the counter along the wall in the restroom with the silver water faucets and big white bowl-like thingys which also contain a lever that once you pull, pink smelly-good stuff comes out... Disneyland (on behalf of Sparkle) has provided you with helpful instructions.

Stop and Stare

Sometimes when I feel like someone is staring at me too long, I say "What?" in my head... especially when it's strangers.

Today I kept running into this lady at Target who kept staring at me down every single aisle... like STARING. After the 5th time, I exclaim "What?" in my head... but it accidentally came out of my mouth too. I felt like such a jerk.

Happy Birthday, Alissa

Today my sweet sister turns... one year older! I wish I was with her to celebrate... but I'm not. Instead she is with her incredible husband, Greg, and the cutest little 1 year old boy in the world, Luke... and they are with... drumroll, please... the little peanut inside her belly! That's right, my sister is preggers again! She is nearing the end of her first trimester, so please keep her in your prayers. It's hard to believe that Luke is going to be a big brother! We are all very happy!

Anyway... Alissa, in honor of your birthday - this blog's for you!


When Alissa was a baby, I... was jealous that she had blond hair and that she was a baby and I was a "big girl." (yes i remember that even though i'm only 1 year older.)
I was told that I... potty-trained Alissa. Mom says that I would make her go to the potty when I had to go and "showed" her how to potty. Then when she went, I made sure I was in there to sing the "Hooray for Going Potty" song. I still know it.
One of my favorite things about Alissa from our childhood... was sharing a bed with her... for 16 years!!! Her hands are so soft and every night when she would fall asleep (it seemed like she always fell asleep before me) I used to love to hold her soft hand while I fell asleep. Then as we got older, we would sometimes lay awake for hours talking. And then we would fall asleep and she would spend her time stealing covers, kicking me, hitting me and breathing in my face.
Alissa, I'm sorry... that I was the one that told you about Santa. And for making you lift me in all of our synchronize swimming routines. And for being bossy. And for pulling your hair to the ground for stealing my bubbles. And for hitting you when you wore my scrunchie in the ocean. And for making fun of you when you made your angry face (you know... the one with the tongue). And for discouraging you in times when I should have been encouraging. And for being selfish. And for being judgmental. And for not listening well when we were younger. And for not accepting responsibility. And that I live so far away. And that I didn't say "I'm sorry" enough.
That was funny when... mom would tell us a thousand times to stop talking and go to sleep, then she would finally come in and spank us with our face buried in the pillow pretending to cry when we were really laughing. Dad would tie our hands together when we weren't getting along so we were forced to deal with one another (thanks for passing the toilet paper). When you held your claws in Jason's face and said "you want me to do it to you too?" When you fell down the stairs as you were trying to impress that really serious guy. When your prom date picked you up in that 1985 limo.
I really like that... I have a sister that everyone loves and respects. Seriously! She is one of the sweetest, most gentle persons you will ever meet (but knows how to be feisty). She strives to be the best woman, wife and mom she can be (and succeeds!). I don't know a single soul that does not like my sister. And she is worth every ounce of love that people have for her.
By now, I hope you know... that I can still beat you up. That I really don't know it all. That you are a fantastic mommy! That you are beautiful, beautiful, beautiful! How much I look up to you. That I am always here for you. That I consider you one of my best friends. That I wish we lived closer to one another. That you have a great husband and the sweetest little boy. That you are a great wife. That I love you SO SO SO SO much! Oh, and that I will always beat you in Phase 10 ('cause it's about strategy).

I hope that you have a wonderful birthday and I know that this is going to be a GREAT year for you!!

a letter to my pedicurist

Dear Julie,

Ummm... my toe does not bend that way; it actually hurts. Could you please stop forcing it? Oh, and I'd also appreciate it if you stop laughing when I wince from the pain... it's not funny.

Other than that I am very pleased with my experience with you.

Your faithful customer,
Andrea